I wish you’d have the balls to just say so. Rather than leaving the book on an open page.
Is it a sign? What are you trying to tell me?
I can’t hold on anymore like this. It hurts. It aches & my weak heart just doesn’t have the energy anymore. I love him. I always have. Stop throwing what I can’t have in my face. Or just give it to me.
I’m sorry. I just don’t feel like its worth wasting my time, AGAIN. That pain is fucking unbearable. Why fight for something that will probably never happen? Whats the point?
Grown up. Experienced shit I never thought I would.
Its crazy how one guy can effect you so much. Change your mood. Your outlook on things. Drive you off the wall.
I don’t like to admit it, but my days feel empty without you. Texting me. Coming to visit. Just…giving me the slightest bit of attention. What did I do to make things between us so distant? I want it back.
I tried talking to other guys, but they just…aren’t you.
Why can’t I find someone as good as you. With your personality. Your view on life. Your style. Your eyes. That smile. That soft skin. Why can’t I find someone identical to you, who would want me back. Someone who would want me as bad as I want you.
I wish there was a way to make you want me.
I constantly wonder how things could have been if only this or that had changed or never happened to begin with. In some weird way, I feel like one day we’ll both grow up, forget the past, and be friends. I think I’d like that. I wonder if you would too. I wonder if you sometimes think about me, like I do you.
I miss old times. I miss April and May. I miss June & July.
Summer was intense. One of the craziest ones I’ve ever had. I’ll never forget it. I’ll never forget all those faces I used to hang out with almost everyday.
I miss it.
I can only hope fall measures up.
Sometimes I feel like I’ve been single for so long now, that relationships just scare me. I feel like I just avoid them on purpose because I don’t want to go through the whole, meeting each other, getting to know each other, and dealing with trust and everything else. Sometimes I miss when I was young and I fell hard for my best friend. Why does everything have to be so fucking rushed? We can’t get to know each other as friends first? Its so annoying. Guys in general are just annoying.
I’m done wasting my time. Unless someone comes around who I’m completely attracted to, physically and mentally. I’m not pursuing anyone. Whats the point? I know I’m not going to be happy and I’ve come to realize that sex without love is kind of just…heartbreaking. I mean, yes. I like sex & of course, I miss it.
But I can only imagine how good it will be when I find someone who I can fall in love with, someone who will fall in love with me. Someone who will make me happy. Someone who will actually last.
That’s one of the things I miss about being in a relationship. Having sex wasn’t something I would ever feel ashamed about, because I was doing it with MY BOYFRIEND. It was…normal.
I wish we could be more than what we are. I hate the days you make me feel used. Which doesn’t happen often, but believe it or not, you have made me feel that way. Ugly. I hate it. I have a love hate relationship with how up and down you are. As much as it makes me love you, because I realize you aren’t perfect and just like me, you don’t know what you want. You’re just as fucked up as me. I hate it because sometimes I want to smack you and figure you out. I’ve never met someone so confusing. I wish I could just get inside your head and figure shit out. Understand you better. I want to. I wish you’d want me to. I wish you’d let me.
"Don’t make someone a priority, when they only consider you an option"
I hate this quote, cause when I read it, I think of me and you. And I could kick myself in the face for it. I wish you’d prove to me that I’m not just one of your “options”.
who loves to eat. who loves ranch dressing & puts it on everything. who doesn’t have to be rich, but at least have money and not fucking complain about spending it on a good day. who eats taco bell on a weekly basis. who drives and bumps good fucking music. who listens to my music. who works and likes his job. who wants to hang out with me often, but not everyday. who knows how to make me laugh. who doesn’t care about being random, silly, and weird. who enjoys tea and coffee. who thinks out loud. who isn’t afraid to sit down and have a serious conversation. who favors the city over the country. who smiles often and laughs at nothing.
I need a guy who is happy. A guy that isn’t looking for anything. A guy that introduces himself, becomes my friend, gets to know me, with no intentions of what could happen tomorrow, or the next day. A guy who is just in it to make a new friend. A guy that I could potentially fall in love with.
I want a guy who loves to travel and see the world. A guy that dreams big and views the picture as a whole and admires it, rather than complains about the tiny insignificant little mess ups.
Frank’s vet visit went amazingly. He behaved himself like a gentledog lol and got along with everyone real well. First they weighed him - 58.5 lbs. Then we went into the room and met Dr. Tripp. He was funny. He lifted Frank up on this table and checked him out. He knew right away what was wrong and knew what antibiotics to give him. He also gave us some good shampoo that will make Frank feel a lot better. We should be seeing improvements in about a week. Which makes me happy and we have to call Dr. Tripp in 10 days to let him know about Frank’s progress.
I’m so glad my baby is gonna get better, I’m so sick of watching him suffer and now I can finally sleep well knowing he is going to be okay, which in turn, makes everything feel okay.
Right now, I’m just doing some school work, trying to catch up a little, than maybe a walk and bath time for the Jellybean. (:
Taylor is coming to get me after school and she’s taking me to meet her old friends. I’m excited. It should be fun.
I got work tomorrow at 5, but I’m excited about it. Its payday and I’m second out.
Oh and I cleared things up with you, which makes me even more happy. Like, to the max. Ha.
AH! Good day so far. Oh & the sun is out, finally.
“Hours pass and she still counts the minutes that I am not there, I swear I didn’t mean for it to feel like this, like every inch of me is bruised, bruised and don’t fly fast, oh pilot can you help me? Can you make this last? This plane is all I’ve got, so keep it steady now, cause every inch you see is bruised. <3”—Jack’s Mannequin - Bruised
1. you need to get over yourself. seriously, if you can’t trust your boyfriend for one day when you’ve been dating him for over two years, you are beyond pathetic & shouldn’t even be in a relationship. its fucking stupid that you assume so much shit that isn’t even true. didn’t know being friends was such a crime, but honestly, go fucking die you stupid bitch. really, is it so much to ask for everyone to just fucking get a long and have fun?
2. I’m so sick of you. Like really.
3. I miss you and I wish you’d miss me back as much as I miss you. I wish you’d talk to me and things could be back to normal. But this mood changes and that’s just how I feel right now. But really, I miss you.
4. I don’t even know what I want anymore, and because of that, I wanna throw myself out of a window.
5. I had so much fun with you and you’re awesome, but I really don’t even know what I want right now. I hope you can understand that.
6. I’m so tired, I don’t even know how I’m awake right now.
7. Frank goes to the vet tomorrow morning. God, I hope he’s gonna be okay.
8. I need to get out. I feel so depressed and just down lately and I want it to go away now. There is so many awesome things coming up and I wish I could just stop with this feeling and be excited, but I’m not, for whatever reason, and I hate it. >_<
sometimes I wonder why I even still waste my time.
any girl would be pissed if the guy she was sort of seeing decided to go spend the night with his slut of an ex. yeah, I’m a little salty.
hanging out with him today for the first time in a year really put shit into perspective for me. I missed him. his laugh, his smile. that face. the way he talks, so casually. so calm. putting me at ease. I miss our friendship.
I feel like everything is just so clear for me when I’m near him. and when I’m with you lately, its just been a blur of confusion.
getting sick of the same old routine with you and little do you know, what you did tonight really sucked. blowing me off. fogetting my texts and phone calls.
why am I still wasting my time? if you aren’t interested get the balls and just say it. don’t sit there and fucking string me a long.
coffee. tea. cigarettes. hopefully a shitty rainy cold ass day and muggswigz with a good new friend. I’m excited and I plan on fogetting the rest of the world that day, for sure.
I feel so done. I’m done trying, I honestly don’t even care anymore. you do not know what you want and I really wish I could punch you in the face sometimes. yes, maybe I don’t know what I want either. but at least I don’t throw it in your face and pay so much more attention to every one else besides you. asshole.
I watch the way you talk to other girls. its not the same. you’re always so fucking short with me and right now, I’m just fed up with all of it.
honestly, stop being so damn salty towards me. lets see if you decide to chase me now, cause I’m tired of running after for you.
do not give a shit anymore about anything. that is all.
I come over, quarter past two Love in my eyes, blinded by you Just to get a taste of heaven I’m on my knees
I can’t help it I’m addicted But I can’t stand the pain inflicted In the morning You’re not holding on to me
Tell me what’s the point of doing this every night What you’re giving me Is nothing but a heart It’s a lullaby Gonna kill my dreams, oh This is the last time Baby make up your mind
‘Cause I can’t keep sleeping in your bed If you keep messin’ with my head Before I slip under your sheets Can you give me something, please I can’t keep touching you like this It it’s just temporary bliss Just temporary bliss
We were on fire Now we’re frozen There’s no desire Nothing spoken You’re just playing I keep waiting for your heart I keep waiting for you
I am fiending for the sunshine To show our love in a good light Give me a reason I am pleading to the stars Tell me
I’m your one and only, only when you’re lonely
Baby why you callin’ me? Not another one Not try’na be your whole life I don’t wanna fall asleep
I can’t keep sleeping in your bed If you keep messing with my head I can’t keep feeling love like this It’s not worth temporary bliss